 |
| Graphical Flow for Chinese Funerals in Singapore |
 |
| Quick Reference for Bereavement Family |
Funerals can put a great deal of pressure on Chinese families to impress those who are attending. The traditional belief is that the more elaborate and expensive the funeral, the more honor that is given to the deceased and to the family. In the same way, those attending a Chinese funeral are expected to make a donation to the family as a sign of respect and to help defray the cost of the funeral. This etiquette is practiced by Chinese communities around the world including Singapore.
DONATION BOX
Those attending a Chinese funeral are expected to give money to the grieving family directly, or by placing the money — or a white envelope containing the money — into a donation box. A donation box is often present in the home where the wake is being held. If no donation box is present, then the donation can be given directly to the grieving family.
Money can be given directly by hand to a member of the grieving family a day before or during the funeral. In this case, custom dictates that the money should be given in a white envelope. On other occasions, such as Chinese New Year, money is given in a red envelope — red is a happy color in Chinese culture, and white is for mourning. It is acceptable to leave the envelope blank, or to write from whom and for whom the money is on the outside.
AMOUNT
The amount given depends on the income level of the family and their guests. The amount is expected to increase depending on how close the guest is to the deceased or to the family. There is no limit on the amount that can be given, and it is expected that the family receiving the money will repay the same amount when one of those who has attended holds a funeral.
ETIQUETTE FOR GIVING AND RECEIVING
If not placed in a donation box, envelopes should be handed to one of the family members responsible for holding the funeral. When taken, the family member will say “you xin” (有心) in Mandarin or “you sum” in Cantonese, “Thank you” — “xie xie” in Mandarin or “do jeh” in Cantonese — is not seen as an appropriate phrase to be used in an event related to death.
Things to take note upon the death of a loved one
When your loved one passes on, there are a number of matters you will be attending to. A funeral in the style that your loved one wanted is an important event for the family to grieve over their loss.
After your loved one’s life comes to an end, you will need to obtain a Certificate of Cause of Death (CCOD) to register the death within 24 hours.
The CCOD will be issued by a doctor, either at the hospital, or a doctor who visits your home if death occurs at home.
Doctors can issue a CCOD if they know the cause of death, and the death is natural.
If the cause of death cannot be identified or unnatural deaths
Should this occur, the doctor will refer the matter to the police. Even if the death occurred in the hospital, it will also be referred to the police if death was directly or indirectly caused by unnatural events, eg surgical complications, a fall before admission, etc.
If the police is involved, the body will be sent to the Mortuary@HSA (Block 9, Singapore General Hospital). The next-of-kin will need to go to the mortuary to identify the body.
Documents to bring to the mortuary include:
1) Informant’s identification papers, eg NRIC/ Passport
2) Deceased’s identification papers, eg NRIC/ Passport/ Birth Certificate
3) All of the deceased’s medical documents and medicine taken
The coroner will review the case and determine if an autopsy is required. The next-of-kin will be informed of the coroner’s decision and when they may collect the body.
Registering the death
Death registration can be done at the following places:
Please note that you do not need to register the death separately if the body is referred to the Mortuary@HSA, as death will be registered at there.
Upon registration, you will be able to collect the Death Certificate.
Many people choose to place an obituary in the newspapers. This is a personal choice and it is up to you how you would like to place an obituary.
Funeral wakes are opportunities for family, friends and acquaintances to pay their respects to the deceased. You can choose to have the wake at your own home, or at the funeral parlour.
You could also hold the wake at the void deck.
You can book a date and time for cremation or burial at the relevant booking office, through the phone, or online. Your funeral director can also help you to make the booking.
You will need the following documents:
1) NRIC of the applicant and next-of-kin
2) Original Death Certificate (which contains the Permit to Bury/Cremate)
Every family has its own preferences for the ashes of the deceased. Perhaps your loved one has given you instructions about what to do with the ashes.
There are normally two options:
Singapore Funeral Resources & Information 