Overview
Funeral rituals have always been viewed as an important part of Chinese social life. The importance of funeral rituals rests on certain basic beliefs held by the Chinese. First, death does not signify the end of a person’s participation in the living, but it conceived as a process of transition.
The word Tao (or Dao) translates to “path” or “way”, and this way of life is derived from the philosopher LaoTze, and coexists among-st the Three Jewels of Tao ethics: Compassion, Moderation and Humility. Taoism had come into existence in 25 – 220 AD and has withstood 2000 years of changes along the modernization of societal practices in Chinese countries.
While Taoism advocates having a simple, patient and peaceful mind while letting events in life run their natural course, it is also important for Taoists to be around nature as much as possible. Humility is essential as moral characters are developed, Taoists must not boast about their achievements and good deeds with intention to flaunt.
Typical condolence practices
When a death occurs within a Taoist family, it is not uncommon to see the funeral practices involving the 3 major China beliefs – Taoism, Confucianism and Buddhism, being performed altogether. Taoist funeral rites can also be conducted according to the dialect groups of the Chinese, either Cantonese, Hokkien, Teochew, Hainan, or Hakka.
Taoists do not fear the afterlife – death is not the end of the road, but is the continuation into another phase of the soul. It is with this reason, that Taoists strongly adhere to the extensive rituals as it allows the departed to be correctly guided onto his/her right paths into “Paradise”. When inaccurately performed, it is believed that soul of the deceased will be lost in the realms of neither the living nor the undead – left to wander in the unknown.
In the ancient times, the procession would normally be held for 7 to 10 days. The processions in recent times are held anywhere from 3 days to 5 days and 7 days being uncommon.
Phases of the funeral procession
Immediately after death
The “head” (the oldest or the person financially supportive) of the family has to make the important decision of the location where the funeral would be held. The location would be drawn between placing the deceased in a Taoist funeral parlour, within the house’s premises or at the multi-purpose hall/viod deck of a HDB flat.
After a location is finalized, the family then informs friends and relatives of the passing and wake details. The deceased is then brought to the mortuary to be embalmed and cleansed. He/she will be dressed in her best clothes paired with makeup after the embalming and will be placed in the coffin (The deceased will not have anything red on them).
At the house of the deceased
A red or white banner would be hung above the main door of the house signifying a passing. Statues of gods and deities within the vicinity are covered with red paper – this is to block the deities’ view from the sight of death. Mirrors are removed as the superstition behind it is that anyone who sees the coffin in its reflection would bring about a death in his/her family.
The altar and the coffin
There would be wreaths surrounding the altar where a portrait photograph of the deceased are placed in front of the coffin. There will be a opening through glass encasement within the coffin, where one would be able to catch one final glimpse at the deceased. Joss sticks and candles are placed around the altar for family and guests to offer their prayers and respect. Instead of vegetarian food – like in Buddhism practices, it is observed that food of all sorts (favourites of the deceased) are placed upon the altar to act as an offering as well.
During the wake (Days 1 to 3/5)
Family do not wear gold or silver jewellery or red clothing. In more traditional times, it is mandatory for blood relatives and family members to wail and sob during mourning – so as to show respect and loyalty to the deceased; the louder it is, the more respect they would be paying. However, the mourning process is increasingly toned down with modernization.
The family would have to wear white shirts and black/dark blue pants. A piece of colored cloth would be pinned onto their sleeves to signify the relation with the deceased.
Taoist priests would be conducting intervals of scripture chanting and the family, lined according to their order of hierarchy and age, would follow in suit with the chanting. The chanting allows the path of the souls to be smoothed out, removing obstacles and torture for the sins they might have committed in their lives.
Friends and guests visiting to the funeral are required to light incense or a joss stick at the altar as a sign of respect to the deceased and family. Joss sticks and incense money are to be burnt continuously throughout the wake as it helps provide the deceased with sufficient money to spend. And also, if the family is well-to-do, you will see big houses or cars made out of paper in which they will be burning and offering to, to their deceased one, so to ensure their well being in the afterlife.
A bereavement donation box would be placed in the premises as donations are appreciated as a sign of respect to the parties and would help in lessening the funeral costs.
The nights of the funeral would be spent in “vigil” in protecting the deceased body, where family members stay awake throughout the nights. You will see people gambling, as this helps to keep the guests and attendees in a lighter mood and awake.
Guests normally attend the first few days of the wake. After their initial paying of respects, guests are gathered around the tables filled with tidbits and drinks. Guests may proceed to give their bereavement donations (白金 – White Gold) to the family members. They should also give words of encouragement and blessings to the family of the deceased during this period of visitation.
Last day of wake
The lid of the viewing panel on the coffin will be closed, with it sealed shut. On the last day of the wake, the deceased will have a final send-off. This is called the “Last Journey”. The corpse would either be sent to the columbarium for cremation, or to be buried in designated burial grounds. Performed ritualistically with the Taoists monks’ chants and instructions, the hearse brings the coffin to the final grounds where concerned family, relatives and friends are to see the deceased to his/her last path towards paradise.
After-which, everyone attending may have to be sprinkled with “flower water”, so as to cleanse themselves after the send-off.
DO’s and DON’Ts as an attendee
DO’s
• Joss sticks might be offered to you (if not, you can get find them at the on the altar beside the candles), light them up and pay your final respects or words in silence while holding the joss sticks with 2 hands in front of the altar
• If you are unable to do the above, due to conflicts in religion, you may maintain silence politely
• Bereavement donations must be in cash and enclosed in white envelopes, presented to the family of the deceased
• Take a piece of red string from the tidbit tray on the guest tables, and tie it on your finger/hold it until you have left the premises. Dispose of it before entering your residences. This symbolizes a final farewell and ties that you have with the deceased
• Do give kind words of condolences to whoever is affected. A simple condolence (I am sorry for your loss) is sufficient as it can transcend culture barriers.
DON’Ts
• Do not wear red or any bright colored apparel. Sober tones is highly recommended
• Keep your volume to a minimum, control any temper so as to not disturb the dead
• Do not laugh or jest about the ceremonial proceedings, no matter how illogical it may seem
• Do not ask openly about the cause of death, if need be, engage in the conversation quietly
If you do not remember the guidance given, you may also check with the family of the deceased as they would have been well advised on the ceremony procedures and superstitions and would be more than willing to fill you in with the necessary. Alternatively, do feel free to contact me. I being an experienced funeral director would be happy to assist you in your difficult times.
Singapore Funeral Resources & Information 